Monday, January 19, 2009

So, this year is starting off with a bang of sorts. I have a new gig, with the US Air Force, working on the Bolling Air Force Base. I am currently in the San Francisco area attending a class, and am catching up with some old friends. . . . .but first this past weekend. . . . .

I was invited to one of my bartenders from Freddie's after holiday party. Such a nice affair. I brought the boy down a day early, had dinner down by the beach, looked at the ocean than ran back to the car to escape the 9 degree weather! We had a good time, shopping, hanging out and just enjoying each other's company. We were joined by some friends, and went out for a night of craziness. . .good times, late nights. . . .ahhhh Rehoboth. So, we go to this wonderful party. Good food, plenty of booze, and fun people, then head to the bars. . .and this is where things kind of fall apart. The boy decided that it was HIS vacation and wanted to have some fun. He jumped straight onto the dance floor and went at it with the first people he came in contact with, a couple from the party we had just come from. Now, I have had my issues with him before, and this is one of them. He is so free and unadulterated when he dances, he loses track of where he is and just let go. . .making out with people and being completely slutty. . . .

We got into it, I confronted him and he threw right back that I need to move on and find someone age appropriate. . fair enough, true enough. So, he decided to take off and leave us behind. Unfortunately, I had to leave early the next morning for a flight and left him behind. Probably the hardest thing I have ever done, but I had no choice. I arranged for another ride back, but haven't seen him, but he is ok and got back in time for work.

Ok, before the comments come in about what are you doing, why are you letting this stuff go on, I have it under control. .no worries. . . .ok, so now I am in the San Fran area, hooray! I spent this evening with an old friend who I haven't seen in YEARS! It was good to catch up, and hear about his wife and 2 children! So, tomorrow night is hanging with an ex, who now is dating a woman. . huh? I know! Well, to be fair, the old friend who has a wife and kids was kind of my original boy toy. He was 19 and I was 25 when we moved to Richmond together and slept together, in the same bed, and enjoyed each other ummmm, physically. I see a pattern, a pattern that was not apparent previously, seeing him again, after so many years and remembering our relationship makes me realize that I have a Daddy complex. . .yes, I know this is not surprising for you, but it is for me. I didn't think of my self as parental in any way, but now I see that I crave helping young people traverse life and learn to be about life. Weird huh? So, I see now that I need to focus back on me, back on my happiness and not teach, not guide, but live my life.

I look forward to seeing my other ex-gay ex and, the other friend, who I haven't seen since he was 16! He was a model, and is now working on getting a degree in acting. I am so excited. . then, finish the trip off with an age appropriate bar hopping spree in the Castro. . .hooray! Back in DC this weekend! Hooray for Obama!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

So, I have been remiss in posting, so here's a short catch up.

I had a fabulous Wine and Cheese party last weekend, which was a big hit. I wanted to invite everyone I knew, however, my apartment being the size it is. . no more 60 people parties for me. As it was, with 25 people, the cops came twice to break it up! LOL! The sign of a truly good party (for pics, check out my albums on Facebook).

With my time off I have been able to spend more time with the boy, and I have really enjoyed myself. . .sure, we aren't dating and he considers me his best friend, but I am slowly getting used to our relationship, and have had very few melt downs in the new year. . .hooray!

Unfortunately, my bosses found me a position working for the Air Force up on Bolling Air Force base, so my extended bench time was cut short, probably a good thing too! This whole sleeping until 2 pm is for the birds! I like the sun! So, back to work I go. Of course, I worked today and Tuesday and am now off until the 2nd week in February! Hooray! First stop, REhoboth Beach, DE with the boy and some of my Freddies pals where I am attending a fabulous party hosted by some Freddies friends. Then I rush back on Sunday to catch a 3 pm flight to San Francisco for a week of training, Hooray! Then a week of training in McLain, VA and finally a week of training in Houston, TX. . .hooray? LOL.

Aside from that, just doing my thing, trying to stay in more and relax. . not drink, and actually take better care of myself. Looking forward to a kick ass year, and who knows, maybe a show will pop in there too at some time. . . .there are days I really miss doing shows, and there are days where I think to myself, do I miss it? The answer, yes. .I really do.

Peace.

Thursday, January 01, 2009

A New Year Dawns!

So, now that things have calmed down and I can gain some perspective on things, I am ready to start anew this 2009. As you have read, 2008, not such a good year for me. Now I have the chance to make things good again. I finished my hell project, and have the ability to rest and relax until March 1st, when my next project starts. My boss is signing me up for training classes, not sure where yet, but am hoping to0 get some travelling in. Don't know what my next assignment will be, but am hoping for 1) Non Government 2) travel. I didn't give up acting to drive back and forth to Baltimore!

The home life is good. The boy is still with me, and our friendship is becoming pretty tight. Its tough, I would love to bring him out and about with me, meet more of my friends, but being 19, the options are limited. Having someone to cuddle with, and spend time with, go to dinner and such has made me lax in my quest to find love in DC, but they always say it happens when you are not looking. ..well fate, I am not looking, lay it on me! :)

I am focusing on making some positive changes in my life. Having 2 months off of work could play out quite badly for me and my party boy ways, and I am focusing on not letting that happen, on reading more, working out more and having more intimate gatherings of movies and games rather than beer and whiskey fests. Fear not, I am not going to get all lame and what not, just need to grab the reins and reflect on the crappy situations partying has gotten me into and how to deflect those situations in 2009.

All and all, I hope to bring more smiles than "awww's" in my blog and hope to make some awesome memories this year. Happy New Year all!